I refer to "Drug abuse a crisis: The north in a grip: Parents don't care" (TB, 1 June)

Like most concerned persons I am indeed very concerned. Thus the sub-heading:

"Parents don't care", is the motivation for my writing this letter.

Nowadays , many newspapers and magazines are highlighting this very issue of drugs

and our children. I would like to say that probably there are many concerned parents

who do indeed care, but feel they have nowhere to turn to for help and support.

But help is at hand.

There is a parent support group in the Tygerberg area.  At present we have a

membership of approximately 25 caring parents who are facing and learning how to

best deal with our problems. We learn early on in the program that problem children

have problem parents!

It is at the ToughLove meetings that I am learning to face the world again. I am

learning to change myself, and make a positive stand against my child smoking

dagga and tik.

I am learning that I have a right to a peaceful life without the devastating prescence

of drugs. I know I cannot cure my child, but can make it difficult for him to do drugs

in the  future.

I am learning how not to be an enabling parent, and that my child must learn to take

responsibility for his own actions.

Most importantly, I am learning that I I am not alone, feeling trapped in the web of

lies, abuse, and deception and misery brought about by my substance abusing son.

Sure, it takes courage to get to a ToughLove meeting for the first time. But for me

it was the beginning of positive changes to get positive results.

Louise McNish

The Tygerburger - Wednesday 15th June 2005